Rams announce new loan signing

Last updated : 24 February 2003 By
Plastic Bertram
With the financial crisis still an issue at Pride Park, Derby County have just announced the new loan signing who fits within their stringent new wage structure. Plastic Bertram will join the squad for Saturday's game against Leicester.

Manager John Gregory is pleased with the new striker and has hopes of bringing in more loan signings from FC SUBBUTEO who play in the Chinese Boxa league.

One player the Rams manager has his eye on is central defender Rene Plastice who has recently recovered from a broken leg via a new and revolutionary method involving tweezers and a tube of Bostic.

Derby officials will now be try for a work permit for the new striker but it is feared they may have to ask the player to marry his longtime girlfriend, a Miss Sindy Mattel who is English and would automatically qualify the player for a permit.